What self-sabotage looks like...

 

Hey you. 

I hope you have been staying positive. I wanted to talk about what self-sabotage is. It comes in many different forms and as a believer (or not), you have to address these particular behaviors in order to move forward in life. 

Before I address what self sabotage is, we need to be on the same page on its definition. Per dictionary.com, sabotage is "any underhand interference with production...as enemy agents during wartime or by employees during a trade dispute." The primary highlight about SELF-sabotage is that the enemy is YOURSELF, and our adversary relies on this concept to destroy you from the inside, without much effort. 

In my few years of living, I have seen self-sabotage play out in the lives of others and myself. So here are some covert indicators that self-sabotage may be knocking on your front door...

1. Self sabotage is glorifying your trauma and refusing to move forward toward self-healing (e.g., refusing to go to therapy, refusal to change for your betterment). 

2. Self sabotage is not saying no.

3. Self sabotage is "ghosting" or attempting to ghost other people when things go bad because you'd figure that they would ghost you first.

4. Self sabotage is allowing unGodly thoughts to creep in and have you question covenant relationships. 

5. Self sabotage is saying "I will do it later" when you can do it now.

6. Self sabotage is not applying because you think you wont get the position.

7. Self sabotage is staying anonymous when sharing your work because you think you don't deserve the attention.

8. Self sabotage is refusal to set your account to public when you have so much to share with the world. 

9. Self sabotage is not enjoying something by yourself because you feel the need to be accompanied with someone else to truly enjoy yourself.

10. Self sabotage is not going to the bathroom and "holding it in" when you really need to go. 

11. Self sabotage is not booking the appointment to the dentistry office because you are afraid of what the dentist will find. 

12. Self sabotage is marrying that person, even when you are not sure, because a date has already been set.

13. Self sabotage is refusing to speak up when you are uncomfortable about something that crossed your boundary.

14. Self sabotage is taking an extra hour of rest instead of using that time to pack your lunch for the next day.

15. Self sabotage is reaching for the soda can when all you need is the bottle of water. 

16. Self sabotage is sitting on a project for months because you think it's not perfect enough to publish.

17. Self sabotage is not taking the time to set up "do not disturb" settings on your phone during work hours. 

18. Self sabotage is you reaching the conclusion that it cannot be done because no one else has done it before.

19. Self sabotage is doing (any type) of work for free because you don't think you deserve the money.

20. Self sabotage is choosing to tell the world about your plans but have not made any effort to follow through on said plan (you are at square 1, shouting about how you want to reach to square 20).

...I think you must have gotten it by now. Self-sabotaging behavior can be quite practical and overlooked, but the effects are detrimental. It can make you lose trust in yourself and eventually, you are not able to finish complex tasks or personal projects you make for yourself. This, in turn, slowly chips away at your self-worth and esteem, and before you know it, you are doubting if you can accomplish a small task. Self-sabotage is a for sure way to implode your potential from the inside-out. 

If you relate with any of the covert examples I left up above, its time to clean up house. God wants to change our world, but he needs the healthiest version of you to do it. So what do you say? Take some time today and ponder to address a behavior in your life that may be deemed as self-sabotaging. Acknowledge your level of inadequacy and ask God for help. Call a loved one or reach out to a friend that can hold you accountable. START TODAY AND DO NOT DELAY. God is counting on you!

Thanks for reading! 

And let's chat! Do you feel like you are indulging in self-sabotaging behaviors? Feel free to share in comments below (remember, people want to hear from YOU too!)

Giving you lots of love.

Whitney